I have food anxiety.

"My citroen won't start" (lucasboechat)
02/16/2018 at 09:29 • Filed to: None

I’m very used to eating on random times, IE when I get hungry, doesn’t matter if it’s lunch at 11:30 or 17:00. But when lunch has a fixed time or schedule, things get weird.

I have a buisness meeting/lunch scheduled for today at 14:30. I’m already hungry and keep counting the minutes to eat, the problem is that I don’t think I’m really that hungry, I’m just anxious that someone has chosen the time for a meal that does not necessarily align with my will.

I do that all the time, hotel breakfasts are terrible because they have a time limit, I can’t sleep at night because breakfast ends at 10 AM, I usually have breakfast by midday during vacations or the weekend. I keep thinking that I’m going to miss breakfast by a few minutes and lunch is too far away.

I normally have a cigarette, coffee and tuna sandwich on rye when that happens, but I will think about the missed breakfast for the entire day.

Same with tourist trap places like Safaris and the like that have “Snack Times” built in the attractions/plans. You just can’t leave and have a nice lunch, you are stuck there not knowing that lunch will be, it could be cheap sandwiches and warm grape juice. NO! That is not lunch!

And then we have airplane food, which is almost always terrible, but for some reason, when the plane interior lights up and the little cart wheels start squeaking, my mind goes full throttle.

“It’s food time, Oh god I’ve been inside this sad metal flying bus for 6 hours now. I need something to eat, maybe it’s going to be good, maybe it isn’t mushy pasta for once. I hope the bread is warm”

And in the plane I can’t have a cigarette, because people like their own lives and want to live longer nowadays or something.

I hope I never go to jail.

DISCUSSION (9)

DutchieDC2R > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 09:58

I feel your pain man, but I cant stop picturing you telling this story in a late ‘90s Seinfeld outfit in front of a crowd. ‘What is up with lunch these days?!’.....

CalzoneGolem > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 10:14

Maybe have a snack and a smoke now

diplodicus > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 10:30

This is why I take Apples, Bananas, and clementines with me like everywhere I go. Sometimes I forget I have fruit in my pockets and hope no one at the grocery store thinks I’m stealing produce.

My citroen won't start > CalzoneGolem
02/16/2018 at 10:42

But then I won’t be able to enjoy lunch, because breakfast was not that long ago.

I had a Coke and a smoke, that should keep me sane for a few hours.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 12:37

It sounds like maybe the underlying problem is general anxiety (which I can relate to) and it’s manifesting itself by making the focus food and meal timing. I get similar feeling when I’m traveling (which I do frequently) about having ready access to a toilet. Then I worry so much about it I need to pee like every hour. It is really frustrating and inconvenient. I really can hold my pee for 2-3 hrs at a time but dang it, I use the toilet at least once on the airplane every singe flight.

My citroen won't start > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
02/16/2018 at 12:52

Yeah, I have a problem with full blown anxiety, I also have what you mentioned. But I was reminded today of how I hate scheduled meals, which is quite funny because most people get anxious about unscheduled/unplanned things.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 13:15

Sitting at the gate on a plane in SFO for 1.5 hours was the worst!

My citroen won't start > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
02/16/2018 at 13:27

I have this thing where I can’t poop on public toilets, I just can’t, it’s a mental block. I once got stuck for 4 hours in Heathrow and then 9 hours in a plane after eating a bad tuna sandwich at the airport.

Everything was fine until the middle of the flight, when the cold sweats started. When I finally decided that I no longer could deal with my mental block I unbuckled from my seat to head to the toilet - “I’m no longer going to bothered by this mental block, from now on I will be unchained by this poop block” - I thought.

When I reached the toilet a stewardess told me to return to my seat as we were about to land.

I nearly fainted.

When we landed I made a beeline for the firt bathroom at a Brazilian airport. It was just a terrible, dark bathroom. I still have the mental block.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > My citroen won't start
02/16/2018 at 13:36

10/10 I have never pooped on a plane. I think it would have to be some serious touching cotton situation to go that far. I usually travel with some pepto tablets if I have issues with food. It has saved my ass (literally) several times. 3-4 tablets and poop stays in. Otherwise I don’t mind public toilets as long as an ass gasket is supplied.